tomorrow the ashes hit the ground

The wide prairie field, the warmth of the sun and spring breeze evaporating my flowing tears, dog running with unbridled exuberance, my feet still, my eyes to the heavens, my heart so broken.

Was her heart still beating when they took her away?

Did she have a soul?

Does she miss me as much as I miss her?

Where did my hope go?

Will this ache ever go away?

Will I ever be whole?

Am I ready to say good-bye?

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4 thoughts on “tomorrow the ashes hit the ground

  1. The ache remains I think. It’s just that the pain dulls over time, or so I have discovered.

    This will be difficult, I won’t sugar coat it. But you will get through the day, and the next day, and the next.

    I have you in my thoughts.

  2. It does get easier. And then it doesn’t. You won’t ever be who you were. She has changed you, and her loss has changed you, and it’s up to you what you make of that. I wish you peace, my friend.

  3. Hi,
    I was at the same ceremony, with a similar stories. I don’t think the pain ever goes away, it just becomes easier to deal with.
    I wanted to say sorry for your loss, and thank you for writing out about it. My husband and I chose not to reach out to others and now eight months later I wish I had seen the grief counsellor, spent some time with a group, so on and so forth.
    I am happy that I found your site today, thanks for reminding me that life goes on…..
    -Sarah

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